It’s only happened to me once so far. Posting a day late. I made that choice because I wanted to celebrate Sunday with family instead of sit in front of laptop and write. This week I made to switch to post my daily thoughts in the evening. I have noticed that more people seem to read it later on the day, but I am not sure how I feel about changing my morning routine.

This week has been a little bit crazy. I have been on the phone for interviews and conversations about jobs, I’ve been travelling to different places to meet with potential new colleagues. In the mean time I have woken up with a fever. Went to bed super early on most days and been coughing and clogged up. Just a typical winter sickness you would think. That’s probably what it is and I would love to spend a few days in bed in my pj’s. However I try to keep going. Take a painkiller and get in that train anyways, because I don’t want to wast time or waste an opportunity.

Yesterday afternoon however I had a moment all to myself. I booked a massage, which was a graduation gift from my mum. There is this really friendly lady in town with her own company and I love her massages. Slowly I drifted away in relaxation. But yesterday I couldn’t completely stop all the thoughts. My throat was thick and dry. Even though the massage was really needed and body seemed able to relax, my thoughts kept going. Besides fight a fever, fighting wondering thoughts takes energy.

A few days ago I read my first post again. In that post I made a promise that I wouldn’t always pretend to have this perfect life. If I would feel cold and lonely, I would share that with you. Because I believe that’s how we all feel sometimes. So here it is. Having a normal winter flu sucks. I don’t like it. Yet I am not quite ready to give up fighting against it. I might really collapse somewhere in the next few days, but we’ll take care of it when that happens. For now I am just living hour by hour. Trying not to think to much about my period cramps, doing a few yoga stretches in my chair and blowing my nose for some fresh air.

This afternoon I will jump on my bike for another interview. Focus for an hour. Cook dinner for my family. Travel again and go meet some new people. I don’t have to pretend that I am excited, because I really am. Fingers crossed that my body can just hold on for a couple more days and recover in moments of rest in between.