So today was Amsterdam filled day! Tourist in my own country. Not that we could see much, since the whole city was filled with fog. Yet Amsterdam has something mythical. Some streets and houses seem like they came straight out of a fairy tale. The bridges, canals, houses, history. They make Amsterdam just a little bit different than any other city. 

You might now the book (and movie) The Fault in our Stars by John Green. Amsterdam plays a big role in the book. We walked past that little bench at the Leidsegracht. Throughout the rest of the day some quotes kept popping up in my head. For example ‘life isn’t a wish granting factory’ or ‘you don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you’. If you don’t know it. It’s a story about two teenagers with cancer that meet in a a support group. They start out as friends. Share books and go to Amsterdam to meet the author. The author turns out not to be great, but they do end up falling in love. I won’t spoil the end, but it’s definitely worth reading. 

I am writing about this book, not just because it’s a good book, but also because it makes you think about time. One of the main themes is infinity. Hazel, the main character, at some point says: “some infinities are bigger than others.” What is time? Who long does it last? 

We had dinner with camp friends. We talked about the memories. How short those summer months seem is weird. When you are right in the middle, when you live by the hour, it feels endless. Yet it is over before you now it. 

However, camp is never completely over. It is going to be an infinite part of your life. No matter how far away we are from camp itself, it is always somewhere within us. In the connections that we form and that stay. For an infinity. 

So walking around in the city of The Fault of our Stars made me think about that camp place under the stars. Camp gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I am grateful.

There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.

John Green, The Fault in our Stars