I don’t like to admit it, but I am scared for lots of things. Scared to get seriously sick. Scared to share. Scared to fail. Scared that I am not good enough. Scared of what will happen next. Scared of being lonely. Scared of lossing people I love. Scared to quit. 

This blog. It’s almost over. New year of my life about to begin. And I honestly can’t quite get my head around it. It’s making me sad and happy. Relieved and scared. All at the same time.

But what if we were never scared. Never afraid something will go wrong or fail? We don’t have to be afraid, but sometimes it can be good to be afraid. Because it keeps you awake, alert and going. I am not saying you should have fear hormones running through your veins at all times. I am not saying the fear should paralyze you. But a little bit of facing that anxiety and doing it anyway carries strength. 

Page from Ann Voskamp’s book ‘The Broken Way’. All credits go to this book, which has been a life line in the darkest moments of the past year.

I was terribly afraid when starting this blog. Didn’t know I could do it. Every time I sent a job application letter in the past year I was a bit scared. Scared to fail. Not be afraid to be broken has been a lesson learned this year. To not be afraid of my mistakes, imperfections and all that has been a journey that I haven’t finished yet. 

But for now all that I am saying is this. It’s okay to be scared. Just close your eyes for a second. Feel breath fill your lungs. Above all feel alive and well. And then have a friend make you an ice cream sandwich. 

Cheers to the last weekend of blog writing!